Child Safety .... STAY VIGILANT!

People,

For the past THREE (3) days, I've had this foreboding in regards to child abductions.Keep your eyes and attention on your babies and young children AT ALL TIMES!  There's nothing....no text, no man, no woman, no job, no video, no CONVENIENCE, ETC.... in and out of this world, worth the safekeeping of your babies!  

LISTEN and TRUST your intuition!  Don't try to REDIRECT THAT FIRST VOICE REGARDLESS OF THE INCONVENIENCE!!!   Don't worry about a suspected individual's "feelings"...if they're innocent, they will understand and even if they don't...your child's safety is FIRST!  

Please stay vigilant, y'all... 

With Love.  <3

Frontal Faking...

...the art of emotionally manipulating a new relationship by pretending to be "more" in the beginning, in order to lure someone in....and then changing.

Change...

Change

Journaling.... Self Therapy

You ever go through a situation, that you've been in before several times, and for some reason, the usual internal response from you has changed?  No, this isn't the "meaning of insanity" type of situation, I'm talking about when something inside of you seems to have changed to an extent that makes going back to your usual response seem to be off the table for consideration. 


Ok, let me give you an example...  You're with your long time mate and that mate has a problem staying out later than you'd like him/her to.  When this usually happens, you get all up in a frenzy and argue the point, just to have to go through the same situation again a few weeks later.  And one night, after the late night happens again, you don't feel the need or desire to correct the situation...
------


Ok y'all.... this is why I'm an advocate of journaling!  I usually write these posts as it comes to me instead of a prepared "write, copy and paste" blog post.  And I promise you, as I was writing this post and this made-up example, it became clear...the feeling I'm speaking of is when you give up!  Or at least when you're at the point that you're willing to give up!  When making amends isn't that important anymore.  Wow.


In an effort to understand this, I suggest creating the old "pros and cons" list of the situation.  And depending on how the list comes out, listen to your instincts and act accordingly.  Now look at that...a piece of self therapy in the form of a blog post.  Too cool. 

That's Just Me....Right?

As much as I enjoy talking to people about things that interest me and passing on information, I'm "afraid" to speak publicly.  Now, the reason I've placed asterisks around the word is because I'm wondering if this is truth.  Or is it simply a past limitation I'm holding on to by habit?  I mean, I enjoy the rush and yes, I wish I were better at it but am I really that afraid if I'm constantly searching for opportunities to prove otherwise?


I ask myself this because, in the continuous search of self discovery, I've found I've held on to a few habits that no longer stand true.  Example... when I was younger, I used to love reading but HATED to be stuck in the kitchen cooking.  So I would turn the fire up high in hopes of getting the darn thing over with so I could finish my book.  Anyone who cooks know this is a recipe for disaster...I usually ended up with "out and in" food...  burnt on the outside and raw on the inside.  Ugh!  To this day, my sisters say I can't cook, although they haven't had a bad meal prepared by me yet.  And up until I had my children, I believed them...even when I knew my food was actually quite delicious!

I also started driving at a later age than most folks my age at the time.  So, with my late start, and learning in the DC metro area, I had major apprehension of driving in unknown places because of my fear of getting lost.  Now, the GPS has been in existence for quite a while, however, I still felt as if that was a fear of mine.  So every time I was tasked to drive to a new location I jumped right into this whole panic mode.  And when I thought about the whole situation, I found I actually enjoyed going new places!  My earlier fear of not being comfortable with driving held on with no proof of the truth being present.


We've all heard something said or described about us that we continue to hold on to even without there being proof of it being present in our lives.  Even if it had once been that way, we still held / hold on to it because, well, that's just the way it's always been.  Even the negative things.


When I finally caught myself being constantly praised for a good meal or not being afraid about driving in new places, it was like a weight had lifted!  I no longer had to have the anxiety and worry that came with "being" those things or following the expectations that come with the attributes!!


When was the last time you've checked your so-called truths?  Do you still accept the "truth" made by the 7-year old who called you ugly in grade school?  Do you still believe you are that impatient person your family member dubbed you as, even though YOU can't see this in yourself yet still find yourself over-extending yourself, trying to improve this so-called "fact" about you? ...that in fact, may not even exist any more?


The truth is, sometimes folks say things and then repeat them just because!  And if we hear it often enough, we believe it.  It's time to UN-believe it!  Don't live your present on a past lie!  Search for your own truth and don't let anyone else prescribe YOU to you again!  If you want to accept something as truth, accept this.... YOU. ARE. THE. PERFECT. YOU.  Now, how about that?


With love.  <3

Loving Myself

The first time I recognized I wasn't loving myself was when, in a relationship, I made this self declaration:  "Maybe I'll just go through this and demand better for myself in the next life".  No, not heaven, but my next lifetime.  Talk about martyrdom at it's finest!!  In the present, I'm realizing the first thing to address was my certainty of there even being a "next life".  I don't know how that belief crept in but it was obviously there.  Maybe it was because I KNEW, deep in my soul, things would and should be better for me, and if I couldn't see it then, then surely it had to manifest itself later in my life or lifetime, right?  Well, I now realize that was my inner conflict between my heart and earthly self versus my spirit and my soul.  


I came upon this memory while participating in one my most favorite pastimes, researching.  I found when someone says to another, "just learn to love yourself", one of the most constantly reoccurring questions being asked was, "but HOW? How do I do that, if I haven't been doing it before?"  And honestly, that's a really good question....  How does one learn to love themselves?  That's like asking a colorblind person to describe the color green.  If he's never experienced the color fully, how can he describe it?  When I think about the answer, it makes me dig down and attempt to remember when I feel I made the first baby-step towards self love.


So, there I was...putting happiness off until a lifetime I wasn't 100% sure would even happen. And then something amazing happened....the thought of what that lifetime would look and feel like!!  Oh boy! When I tell you that when you can picture and feel and taste and smell the space you want to be in, you send out the signals to the Universe that make that thing possible!  I saw peace of mind, freedom, sunshine, adventure and yes, some worry and fear but I also saw ....LIFE!  Life in this lifetime!


Every hesitation, every excuse, every fear was slowly but surely set aside to keep that vision of happiness in view.  With that came the faith that God was and always will be, with me.  Regardless of what anyone thought, felt, said, cut eyes sideways, gossiped about, GOD was going to be right there with me and I would move right on through to the other side of peace and happiness.  And that's exactly what I did. 


In no way do I claim to have all of the answers but I can tell you this from MY perspective and experiences.  I had to forgive myself first... for staying in the space for as long as I did; for allowing my loved ones to remain there with me; for not recognizing and then later, recognizing bad behavior but remaining anyways; for not following through with my warnings; even for my overly accommodating belief of "benefit of the doubt" and "human nature".  I then had to get my relationship between me and my intuition back on point again, back to trusting myself and my decisions.  Through self affirmations, fallings but getting back ups, sometimes jumping by the seat of my pants not knowing which direction I was going to fall, and with lots and lots of praying, I found me again.  And I love me...so much. 


I still have lots to learn about myself but I know, who I am at this moment will only get better.  And even as I answer, I realize I'm still growing in my own self love and I totally believe this journey should be a constant movement.


I'm not going to lie and say it was easy,.... but I will offer that it's definitely possible and most assuredly worth Every. Last. Ounce of the work you put into it!


With love.  <3    

Life is But A Dream...

Last night I dreamed about reaching out, schedule changes and feelings of being unprepared.  Don't know exactly where each point will manifest itself in my life but the one I feel moved to blog about, is the "reaching out" part. 


I dreamed, that within my dream, I dreamed of someone who felt such despair, she (he?) was considering ending her life.  In my dream, I walked past a young lady who looked to be attempting to hang herself.  I immediately stopped because I recalled the dream I'd had (within my dream).  When I got to her, I noticed I was mistaken, it was simply a necklace that was caught on the wall behind her.  But I still felt compelled to approach her.


I looked at her and was somewhat hesitant to say what I knew I was suppose to say but something inside pushed me beyond the hesitation, on to have the conversation.  So, I inquired about her well-being, asking her how was she feeling and if she was ok.  She responded with a "yes" but I felt the need to continue the conversation.  I told her that she'd frightened me when I first saw her because it looked like she was hurting herself.  She admitted she sometimes thought about it and participated in things that simulated the act of hanging herself.  I then told her, "well, don't continue that because I love you and wouldn't want anything to happen to you."   She stared at me in what looked like shock. At that point, she burst into tears and we just stood there for a minute within a hug.  I said to her, "If you EVER feel the need to talk with someone or just need someone to listen, I'm here."  She nodded, said "Ok" and we separated.  In the dream, I got the strong feeling she meant it and I would be hearing from her in the near future.  


All of this was a dream and a small part was a dream within a dream.  And I'm almost sure it stemmed from a conversation I had before bedtime.  But what I got from this, was this...


Even when I'm in doubt about what I'm able to do for someone or how I'm able to add value to the life of someone, EVERYONE has a role to grow into.  BUT, no matter where I am in my growth, someone can use the help, advice, listening ear, etc...I have to offer where I am, right here, right now.  And this goes for you too...  Someone is waiting for your gift; so much so, it could be life saving.   Even when it doesn't feel comfortable or you're feeling uncertain about reaching out to someone, don't ignore the push!  They need you.  The world needs you.


With Love  <3
*Edited to add:  After writing this post, I see how all of the points fit into the same scheme of things.  Life is amazing.  Maybe life really is but a dream.  :-)